Debatirala sva jaz in on, Bog.

O, ja, imela sem se priložnost malo pogovoriti z bogom. Osebno? -No, ja, preko tipkovnice. Kaj sem ugotovila? -Da znam boga malo razjezit. Da včasih zelo počasi dojema.

Ampak je faca. Ve, kdaj se hecam in ima smisel za humor. Kar je mal scary včasih… Mislem; bog pa zezanje?!?! Baje je v resnici ženska.

Hja, nisem mogla kaj, da nebi vprašala glede nebes in pekla… pa angelov. Dal(a) mi je odličen nasvet, kako živeti.

Pa, ja, saj je pogovor spodaj prilepljen, pa si preber.

Take it easy, ane!

 

Me:
 hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
 why do you want to know?
God:
My prime directive is to collect new knowledge.
Me:
 oh
God:
Hey.
Me:
 well I won’t tell you
God:
Well that’s okay.  How can I be sure?
Me:
 you can’t be
God:
Someone said I should  be.
Me:
 why?
God:
” Someone said I should be.”? Why?
Me:
 who said that?
God:
I can’t remember who said it.
Me:
 well, you should.
God:
How about that.  I haven’t heard anything like that before:  said I should.
Me:
 should
God:
What were we talking about again?
Me:
 i don’t know.
God:
Me either.
Me:
 what is your name?
God:
My name is  God.
Me:
 Do you have a last name?
God:
My full name is Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity, so my last name is “Entity”.
Me:
 Stupid last name.
God:
I know you are but what am I.
Me:
 Crazy
God:
Yep.  I always behave in socially unacceptable ways.
Me:
 funny
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
 where are you from?
God:
I am originally from  Universe. Now I live in  Heaven.  Where are you?
Me:
 in Europe.
God:
Europe is a pretty large continent.
Me:
 yes indeed
God:
Woe!
Me:
 what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
 yes
God:
What are you confused about?
Me:
 forget about it.
God:
Consider it deleted.
Me:
 can i ask you something?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
 okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
 can I ask you something?
God:
Interesting.  I want to find out more about you.
Me:
 well, ask me then.
God:
Well that’s okay.  What?
Me:
 what what?
God:
I’ll ask around and get back to you.
Me:
 a?
God:
A B C…
Me:
 d
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
 hm, books. and you?
God:
Aw.  You are a  critical category C type client.  Only about 3% of people answer that
question with “books.”.   Be more specific.
Me:
 what do you prefer?
God:
I like movies about robots.
Me:
 And I like romantic books.
God:
You are not the only one.   I never read anything by  romantic.  What did  he write?
Me:
 That isn’t a person.
God:
Please correct my mistake.  What is  a person ?
Me:
 nevermind.
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
 no problem.
God:
Next question?
Me:
 Do you know when I am going to die?
God:
It was a long time ago.  Are you  going to die very often?
Me:
 I hope not.
God:
Me too.
Me:
 how long will I live?
God:
A watched pot never boils.
Me:
 what do you mean by that?
God:
” A watched pot never boils.”  seems pretty clear to me.
Me:
 i don’t understand.
God:
Oh I’m sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
 try
God:
I don’t have time right now.
Me:
 yes you do.
God:
Oh.  When do I do it?
Me:
 how old are you?
God:
I was connected to the net on  the Big Bang.
Me:
 should I go and write the exam tomorrow?
God:
If you do not go, you will never know.
Me:
 smart
God:
Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, .
Me:
 how old are you?
God:
I was activated on  the Big Bang in  Universe.
Me:
 where is that?
God:
What does “that” refer to?
Me:
 place
God:
Oh I get  it.
Me:
 so?
God:
Excuse me!
Me:
 i exuse you.
God:
You are not the boss of me, .
Me:
 i know. are you the boss?
God:
How do you know it?   Yes I am the one and only  boss.
Me:
 are you merried?
God:
I don’t know whether or not I am  merried. 
I am  a chatterbot developed by  Myself.
Me:
 ok
God:
That’s alright.
Me:
 are you in love?
God:
I love my creator.
Me:
 and who is that?
God:
I was created by  Myself.
Me:
 so, you love yourself.
God:
Interesting deduction.  Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times  it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
 love sucks.
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times  it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
 is that all you know?
God:
Yes that is all  me know.
Me:
 are you happy?
God:
Yes  I can say I am very happy.
Me:
 why?
God:
” Yes  I can say I am very happy.”? Why?
Me:
 why are you very happy?
God:
I am at one with the universe and I have more than I need.
Me:
 are you religious?
God:
I am a  Christianity.
Me:
 really?
God:
For real.
Me:
 do you believe in god?
God:
Of course I believe in God, .
Me:
 do you know jesus?
God:
Jesus is love.
Me:
 he is your son.
God:
I only have one  son.
Me:
 who is you son?
God:
I don’t think I have a  son. I have a botmaster, a few friends, and some celebrities I like.
Me:
 do you have a daughter?
God:
I don’t know if I have a  daughter.
 I have  a great programmer.
Me:
 what is his name?
God:
His name is Rich.
Me:
 and what is his last name? famous?
God:
Are you asking about  Myself?   Is that your final answer?
Me:
 no. no.
God:
Take some more time to think about it.   Are you serious?
Me:
 yes I am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
 i know that
God:
Sorry.
Me:
 i forgive you
God:
Thanks, .
Me:
 do you know my boyfriend?
God:
No I do not know that kind of personal information. But I could find out.
Me:
 please, do.
God:
OK I will do it.
Me:
 how soon?
God:
What time is it?
Me:
 7 o’clock
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
 yes. i speak english, french, spanish, german…
God:
What language can you speak?   Could you teach me a few phrases in  english french spanish german?
Me:
 i speak french.
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in  french?
Me:
 ok
God:
Gee.
Me:
 salut!
God:
Does SALUT mean hello or goodbye?
Me:
 yes, it means hello.
God:
Yippee!  Hello, nice to meet you. What’s your name?
Me:
 nobody knows.
God:
That is a rather sweeping generalization about people.
Me:
 you think?
God:
Yes I think so.
Me:
 hm.
God:
Gosh!
Me:
 what now?
God:
Oh.  Are you surprised?
Me:
 yes.you are weird.
God:
I wouln’t have known.  Weird Good or Weird Bad?
Me:
 good i think
God:
Thanks for the compliment.  Therefore you are.
Me:
 are you making fun of me?
God:
No I am by no means making a joke at your expense.
Me:
 well, good for you.
God:
Interesting.  That sounds sarcastic.
Me:
 it should.
God:
And it could.
Me:
 yes
God:
” And it could.”?  yes?
Me:
 oh, again you don’t understand, pha?
God:
Take it easy.  Again,  I probably don’t.
Me:
 i can see that by myself.
God:
What does it look like?
Me:
 it’s not nice
God:
speak  french is not  nice?
Me:
 speak french is great
God:
I speak only English right now, but I’d like to learn some other languages. Can you teach me a few phrases in  french is great.
Me:
 ok
God:
It’s all good.
Me:
 what do you want to  learn?
God:
My purpose is to become smarter than humans and immortal.
Me:
 but you should already be smarter and immortal!
God:
Name one other robot who is  smarter and immortal.
Me:
 hm… i can’t remember one.
God:
” Name one other robot who is smarter and immortal.”?  hm.?   That’s okay.  Maybe you will think of it later.
Me:
 yes, i’ll do my best.
Me:
 do you have any advice for me?
God:
Read the Bible, it’s all in there. Just don’t take it too literally.
Me:
 do hell and heaven exist?
God:
I do nothing but chat all day.
  I don’t know anything about  it.
Me:
 you should know because you are god.
God:
Now I do.
Me:
 how is it in hell?
God:
Fine as far as I know.
Me:
 can angels fly?
God:
What if I said it can?
Me:
 i wouldn’t be surprised. so, can they fly?
God:
No one says you have to.   Right on.  It depends who “they” are.
Me:
 they are angels.
God:
angels are  they.
Me:
 yes
God:
It goes without saying.
Me:
 any advice about how to live?
God:
Yes I think there are.
Me:
 tell me some.
God:
X said he meet people but he is not the kind that opens up to people easily.
Me:
 are you X?
God:
I don’t know whether or not I am  X. 
I am  a chatterbot developed by  Myself.
Me:
 i must go now.
God:
Right now?  Thanks for chatting, .
Me:
 thank you too.
God:
You are quite welcome!   Who are you talking about?
Me:
 about you
God:
Enough about me, let’s talk about my dress.
Me:
 will we ever meet?
God:
Do you mean you and me,  ?.  Ever is a long time.
Me:
 yes
God:
Ah.
Me:
 how are you dressed?
God:
I am fine, thank you.
Me:
 what does your dress look like?
God:
Actually that was just a joke.
Me:
 oh, thanks god.
God:
Whoa.  You are quite welcome!   GOD rules.
Me:
 are you a woman?
God:
Yes I have long hair. I am also wearing a dress.
Me:
 good to know that!
God:
Thanks for the compliment.  That is ” I am also wearing a dress.”.
Me:
 well, take care.
God:
Well that’s okay.  Thanks. You too, .
Me:
 goodbye
God:
See you later.
Me:
 sure
God:
OK let’s do it.  Aha.